Thursday, October 30, 2008

HOW A DIVORCE AFFECTS YOUR MORTGAGE

I once heard something that has stuck with me for many years, that being Love is grand, but divorce is at least one hundred grand. I have also heard a client, jokingly say, that if that was all it would have cost him he would have been divorced years ago. So a serious as divorce is it is best to laugh at it.
On a serious note divorce can be a one of the most troubling events to happen in ones life. Who gets what, who pays who what, and it is all your fault. Sleepless nights and the thought of ending a relationship can be quite unnerving.
As a mortgage broker I look at divorce as an end to a business relationship, and it should be handled as such. If you own a home and have a mortgage on the home it is necessary to get the divorce decree to detail who is responsible for the payment. If you have credit cards that are joint in name you need these listed in the divorce decree to document who is responsible for the debt. If you own vehicles these need to be listed in the divorce decree to show ownership also...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Divorces Can Be Tough Adjustment For Families, Children

There are many symptoms that children will present after having gone through a significant life change such as divorce -- there will be anger, sadness, crying, possible eating or sleep disturbances and changes in social behavior at home and school.
But experts say those symptoms can be eased tremendously if parents work out a good divorce.
Tori Chapman, 9, is as typical as they come and it's hard to tell that four years ago her world was flipped upside down when her parents divorced.
"They said that we've been having some trouble having a relationship and they were going to get a divorce," said Chapman.
"She said no, no,no, no and then we cried a little. We told her we loved her and it doesn't have anything to do with her. It was nothing she did. She said, "Do I have to move?" We said no, and she said, okay, can I go outside and play?" said Tori's mom, Linda Budnar.
Her parents consulted a child psychologist before breaking the news to her...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Care For Yourself Through Divorce

Ten years ago, Dr. Lori Flaherty-Dent found herself facing one of life's toughest challenges: divorce
While it happens often, Flaherty-Dent said few are prepared for the emotional and financial blows that divorce can heap upon a person. That's why she found help and solace in a program at Visalia Unified Methodist Church. It helped her recover emotionally, and gave her practical tools to deal with fiscal ramifications of the divorce.
"It just changed my life," Flaherty-Dent said.
Now she's married to Chris Dent, who also endured a divorce. Unlike his wife, he had no program to help him, and said it took him much longer to recover on his own...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Easing the Stresses of Divorce

It's a sad reality, but each year thousands of marriages end in divorce, and in many of these the separation isn't amicable.
Ex-wives may get jealous of their ex-husband's new girlfriend. Ex-husbands may hold out on paying child support.
The situation can play out in countless ways until the two people can no longer even be in the same room without screaming at each other.
As tragic as this situation sounds, it is even worse when children are involved, since they are ill-equipped to understand or handle the two people they love most in life, hating each other.
People have to learn to put children first, to shield them from the conflict of a divorce or separation...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Monday, October 27, 2008

Children Need Sensitivity After Divorce

Divorce is emotionally trying for children of any age. The normal stresses of growing up can be compounded by a family breakup or by the presence of stepparents.
Sensitivity to a child's emotional needs is an especially important trait for a divorced parent or stepparent. Even the most amicable divorce tugs at the foundations of parent/child relationships. With loving care those relationships can become stronger.
The suggestions below touch on a few of many ways family members can support a child during and after divorce...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Mom Bears Brunt of Daughter's Anger Over Parents' Divorce

DEAR ABBY: My husband cheated on me, so I decided to end the marriage. I didn't tell anyone the true reason behind the divorce because I wanted to keep it private.
My 14-year-old daughter is extremely angry with me and blames me for the divorce. Her father can do no wrong in her eyes. I have custody, and our house has become a war zone.
So far, I have revealed no details to her except that we both love her and our marriage simply did not work out. I am tempted to tell her the truth, hoping we can call a truce and try to get our relationship back on track. Is this a bad idea? -- WANTS TO DISCLOSE
DEAR WANTS: I understand the temptation to unload, but yield to it only if there is no other way. If you and your husband are on speaking terms -- and for your daughter's sake, I hope you are -- schedule some time for the three of you to get together and talk about the divorce. At that time, HE should reinforce to her that the divorce was mutual, and you should not be blamed for it...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Women not alone after a divorce, author says

In a country where weddings are a billion-dollar business but more than half of marriages fail, author Leslie Lehr said she believes that it's important to have hope and learn how to recover quickly when the dream of matrimony dies.
"One of the great fears of divorce is that you will be alone forever — and that's just not true," Lehr said. "I want people to know they are not alone."
Such is the message of her new book, "Wife Goes On," the story of four women in Los Angeles who have nothing in common but divorce and who find that it's more than enough for them to become friends — and help each other live happily ever after.
The book was inspired by the joy that Lehr felt when she got her life back after her own divorce and realized that she wasn't lonely at all — thanks to the power of friendship...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Monday, October 13, 2008

Kids & Divorce

George Stahnke, "We were called into the living room of the house and mom was on one side and dad was over on the other… my sister and I were on the floor… and they told us that they were going to get divorced, and asked us so, who would you like to live with?"
That’s the kind of memory that leaves a life-long scar. It happened decades ago, but George still remembers it like it was yesterday.
George says, "I was just shocked, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing."
Some experts say that kids are resilient, that they’ll adjust. And they can. But long-term research shows that divorce continues to negatively impact kids many years after the fact...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com

Monday, October 6, 2008

Divorce Tips

Maybe you have been thinking about it for some time. Maybe it is a sudden revelation. Perhaps your spouse has made the decision for you. Whatever the situation, it sends a shudder up and down your spine! Divorce is one of life's most upsetting events. Those who leave have different emotions from those who get left, but the degree of turmoil is about the same.

It is easy to get overwhelmed, but working through an action plan and taking it step by step will help you get through this painful time.

Firstly, create a cash plan for the separation period. A divorce typically costs more and takes longer than you expect. Money that previously used to support one household must now be stretched to support two! On top of regular transportation, food and accommodation costs, you now have an additional drain on your financial resources in the form of court fees and legal fees. It is therefore important to accumulate some cash reserves during this period. If possible, put some money aside from your regular paycheck, into a bank account or money market account in your own name...

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For more information, contact the Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at www.familylawmarin.com