Most divorcing parents are concerned about the impact of the divorce on their children. In fact, many people either delay or completely forego divorce out of fear of its impact on children. While there is no question that divorce impacts children, divorcing parents can take constructive measures to lesson the impact and to encourage resiliency in their children.
One key time for children is the actual separation of the parents. Parents can lesson the adverse impact by adequately and forthrightly informing the children about what is happening. Many parents mistakenly think that they should keep information from the children. When they ask me if they should tell their children about the marital problems, I reply, "They already know." I go on to explain that the parents are the very center of their children's universe and they are very aware of what is going on in their universe. To try and keep matters from them in hopes of protecting them is probably foolhardy. But, this being said, I recommend parents consult with a child development specialist about how to communicate with children, given their age, gender, attachment to parents and maturity. Chinn & Associates also has some reference materials which will be sent to you upon request.
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For more information, contact the Family Law Offices of Renee M. Marcelle at (415) 456-4444, or online at http://www.familylawmarin.com/